With that being said, next Tuesday is primary election day in New York City. This means I am being bombarded with television and radio ads for the various and sundry nincompoops who think it is their birthright to feed at the public trough for the length of their lives (kind of like welfare, only when you're a public official you not only don't have to work, you don't have to take responsibility for anything either).
So, here goes the very first RBL&S Assclown Roundup:
These pillars of demagoguery, pedantry and unbrightness appear in the order they popped into my head, and since the GOP and Democrat parties are both chock full of insane people rendering them indistinguishable from each other, I'm not bothering to list party affiliation.
|Duh, of course people should|
all think the way I do.
|Libertarian or not, I never trust a grown man who thinks|
with his tongue sticking out.
Guiliani an idiot. He often Tweets ridiculous things filled with errors and then blames it on too much wine. He apologizes but then says he tells it "like it is" and "how he sees it." In an attempt to make you feel sorry for him, Joe calls himself a "9/11 cancer survivor” although 9/11 happened in 2001 and his cancer scare happened in 2006.
|At least he'll never ask anyone to lend him a hand.|
He takes care of himself, himself.
|"...and her ass was this big, so I asked for a discount."|
prostitutes cost him his job. Since he can't earn a living anywhere else he wants to get another job in government. Spitzer is the poster child for what is wrong with our political system: He spits on the public trust then finds he can't get by without the public's support (see Anthony Weiner). Loves to have him some prostitutes, touts how no one "did more than him" to promote women's rights and health.
|Bill deBlasio (r) pandering to a special-interest group |
near you. Geez, now everyone wants a discount.
|I tried to find an unflattering picture of Catsimatidis,|
but they all looked like this.
So go out and vote, New York City! America's comedy future depends on you people taking one of these clowns seriously. And since you will indeed vote for one of these people–proving to the rest of us that you don't take your own future seriously, then make fun of you all we indeed will do.
Note: If you are offended by anything in this piece, you have way bigger problems than what you read in some dopey blog.