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Monday, May 14, 2012

What Exactly the Hell Am I Entitled to Anyway?

Occasionally, I am so busy fighting with liberals on Twitter that I run out of words for a new column. Today is one of those days. Also, as I approach my 20,000th reader I'll be re-posting some columns from back when just my dad read this blog. This piece was originally published February 23, 2011.



So it seems that everybody is complaining lately because nobody is getting what they're entitled to. I'm speaking mostly about labor unions, and more particularly about government and public sector labor unions. But as I think deeper, I could also be talking about teenagers, ex-spouses, that lady that cut in front of me this morning at Dunkin' Donuts, and for that matter, everybody else. So I did some reading in an attempt to figure just what the hell I am entitled to exactly. There were no websites or books enumerating what I was entitled to, but I did come across the Bill of Rights in the Constitution of United States of America, which was nice enough to list my rights for me. So here's what I was able to figure out I'm entitled to, and this goes for the rest of you too (even Democrats).

I am entitled to:
  • a government that does not force a religious practice on me
  • assemble peacefully and petition the government about my grievances
  • keep and bear arms
  • not have soldiers stay in my home unless I want them to
  • not be searched unreasonably or to have my things seized by the government without a warrant
  • not be tried for a capital crime without an indictment
  • not be put in jeopardy of my life or limbs twice for the same crime
  • be free to not testify against myself
  • not be deprived of my life or arms or legs or property without due process
  • keep my property unless the government wants it for the public good, and at that point they have to pay me fair market value for it
  • have a speedy trial in front of my peers when I commit a crime
  • confront my accusers
  • have a jury trial if I get sued for more than $20
  • not be cruelly or unusually punished
  • live in a state that takes care of the rest of the rights the Constitution doesn't list
Among other things, I was broken hearted to find that it doesn't say anything about me being entitled to healthcare, or a job, or a flatscreen TV, or a raise, or anything. In fact, pretty much the Constitution is telling me "look, I'll make sure the government leaves you alone, now you go out and be free and make yourself a nice little life."

Sorry kids, I just listed all of the things we as Americans are entitled to. If it's not on this list its not Constitutional. I guess you'll all have to be happy with being free enough to follow your own human potential.

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